A friend asked me to teach a class on parenting recently and that (to be frank) scared me. Anyone who has a child knows that very few are qualified to teach parenting simply based on the disasters that go on in every home! My kids are far from perfect, and my skills as a parent are extremely lacking… so parenting is not something I should ever teach! So we decided that while I wasn’t qualified to teach, I am qualified to facilitate a discussion and share my mistakes along the way. Hopefully, you’ll become a better parent just by trying to avoid my mistakes!
Now, I am so glad that I agreed to facilitate this small group because our first session was so much fun and I really believe it will be extremely helpful to everyone involved – especially to Chantae’ and I! I think we learned from the group things that will make a difference in our life even yesterday! There were just four couples, but I believe each couple will become better parents as a result of our chat together Sunday. I don’t want you to miss this group if you’ve been considering being a part. Missing the first week won’t set you so far back that you can’t join in, but we will close this group after week 2. The group isn’t going to close after week two because we don’t want you to participate, but rather because you won’t be able to keep up and we won’t have time to catch you up because we only meet one hour each week.
Our parenting small group session 2 will be Sunday, October 21st and not Sunday, October 14th. On the 14th we will be at the McGalliard Falls Park, for a picnic, volleyball, football, etc… following our 10:30am worship service in the Waldensian Trail of Faith Cave. If you want to be a part of that day, just show up at aplacetotalk at 9am… then we’ll travel together to the cave at 10am.
Here is a quick recap of Session 1:
I titled Session 1 – Planned Positive Parenting
– Companies who want to be “values based” establish three key things up front: their brand, their mission statement, and their core values.
– Families, bring children into the family and rarely tell them or teach them what is expected of employees (or members) of their family.
– Typical parents give the children zero expectations and only “parent” in times of discipline.
– As we continue through the sessions, we’ll see that our goal is discipling (positive planned parenting) instead of discipline.
– When a child acts in a way that doesn’t align with our family values, mission statement, or brand instead of simply disciplining negative behavior, we can also ask the child how that behavior doesn’t align with who we are as a family. For example, I could say “Noah you know that McDowell’s don’t do that. Instead we (insert core value here).
– The primary message of the night was this: “Children will not become what you tell them to become, but instead they will become what you show them. More specifically, children will become a reflection of you or a reaction against you.”
Our homework for this week, due in rough draft form worked on as a family or couple on October 21st is begin developing your brand, mission statement, and core values. The brand is one image or symbol of who you are as a family. The Mission Statement is one sentence 10 – 30 words explaining who you want to be as a family. Finally the core values are 1 – 10 short sentences (written at or below a 6th grade level) about what your family values.
Here is the hand-out from Session 1.